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Estate planning for
blended families.
About one in three New Zealand marriages are second or subsequent unions. Many couples enter new relationships with children from previous partners, existing assets, and family expectations that don't fit neatly into standard estate planning templates.
1 in 3
New Zealand marriages are second or subsequent unions
Sideways disinheritance.
The most common estate planning approach for couples is mirror wills. Each partner leaves everything to the other, with children inheriting after both parents have died.
Why this creates serious risk
If the first partner to die leaves everything to the survivor, that survivor now controls all the assets. They may remarry, update their will, or simply favour their own children over their late partner's children.
The result is "sideways disinheritance." Assets meant for one family end up passing to the other. The children of the first partner to die receive nothing, or far less than their parent intended.
This happens more often than people expect. A grieving spouse may intend to honour their late partner's wishes. But time passes, circumstances change, and the children from the first relationship gradually fade from priority.
The mirror will trap.
Partner A dies
Everything passes to Partner B under the mirror will
Partner B remarries
Under the Wills Act 2007, remarriage revokes the existing will
Partner A's children inherit nothing
Assets originally intended for Partner A's children pass instead to Partner B's new spouse or their children
Stepchildren and legal rights.
Stepchildren have limited inheritance rights under New Zealand law. Understanding these rights is essential for blended family planning.
Intestacy rules (Administration Act 1969)
Under the intestacy rules (dying without a will), stepchildren inherit nothing. Only biological and legally adopted children qualify. A stepchild who has been part of the family for decades has no automatic right to a share.
Family Protection Act 1955
Stepchildren may be able to claim against an estate, but only if they were being maintained by the deceased or were members of their household. Even then, claims are discretionary and less certain than claims by biological children.
Learn more about FPA claimsThe practical implication: If you want to provide for stepchildren, you must do so explicitly in your will. The law will not step in if you forget.
Protecting both interests.
Many people in blended families have two goals that can seem to conflict: they want their current partner to be secure, and they want their own children to eventually inherit their share. Several approaches can achieve both.
Life interest arrangements
You leave your partner a "life interest" in certain assets, usually the family home. Your partner can live there (or receive income from it) during their lifetime. When they die or move to care, the asset passes to your children.
Your partner has security. Your children's inheritance is protected.
Read our life interest guideSpecific bequests
You leave particular assets directly to your children, while other assets go to your partner. The family home might go to your partner outright, while investments or a bach pass to your children.
This gives certainty, but requires enough assets to divide meaningfully.
Trusts
A trust can hold assets for the benefit of both your partner and your children. The trust deed sets out what each can receive and when. This provides flexibility but adds complexity and cost.
Consider a testamentary trust that comes into effect on your death, or a living trust that you establish now.
Contracting out agreements
Under the Property (Relationships) Act 1976, you and your partner can agree on how property will be divided if the relationship ends or one of you dies. This removes uncertainty about relationship property claims and lets each partner plan for their own children.
Understanding contracting outHow you own property matters.
How you hold the family home has major implications for blended families. The wrong ownership structure can override your will entirely.
Joint tenancy
The surviving owner automatically inherits the whole property when the first owner dies. This happens outside the will, overriding any other plans.
For blended families, this can mean the surviving partner owns the entire home, with no obligation to preserve anything for the deceased partner's children.
Tenants in common
Each person owns a defined share (usually half). Each share passes according to that person's will. You can leave your half to your children, subject to your partner's life interest if you choose.
The property doesn't automatically transfer to the survivor, giving you control over what happens to your share.
Action point
If you are in a blended family and own property as joint tenants, consider whether that's still appropriate. Changing to tenants in common is straightforward and may be essential for your estate plan to work as intended.
Talking about intentions.
Estate planning in blended families works best when both partners discuss their intentions openly.
This can feel uncomfortable. Raising the topic may seem like you don't trust your partner or you are planning for the relationship to fail. But failing to discuss it creates worse problems.
Questions worth addressing together:
- What do we each want for our children?
- What does the surviving partner need to live comfortably?
- What assets came into the relationship, and what have we built together?
- What do we expect from stepchildren, and what do they expect from us?
Partners don't need identical wills. Each person can make provision for their own children while also providing for their partner. The goal is complementary planning, not identical documents.
When relationships change.
Blended family estate plans need regular review as circumstances evolve. The Wills Act 2007 contains important rules about what happens when your relationship status changes.
If you separate from your partner, your will remains valid but may not reflect your intentions. Separation does not revoke a will. If you die before the divorce is finalised, your separated partner may still inherit.
Under section 18 of the Wills Act 2007, marriage revokes your existing will.
Any planning you did after your first marriage is wiped out. You need a new will.
Under section 19 of the Wills Act 2007, divorce treats your ex-spouse as if they had predeceased you. But this doesn't automatically update your will to reflect your current wishes - you should still make a new one.
If your partner dies before you, your planning changes again. You may now be the sole decision-maker, with responsibility to both sets of children.
Key Takeaways
Related Guide
Follow our step-by-step process to create a will that protects your blended family.
Read the Creating Your Will GuideRelated Reading
Life Interest Wills: Protecting Your Spouse and Children
How life interest provisions can protect your spouse while ensuring assets ultimately pass to your children. Essential reading for blended families and second marriages.
What comprehensive estate planning includes
Estate planning is more than making a will. Comprehensive planning brings together wills, trusts, and EPAs into a coordinated plan that protects you and your family.